Christmas Week Begins!

Well, it is the week of  Christmas and I am so ready for a vacation.  I am going to be spending some time with the folks and a bit of time at home getting ready for the new year.  I have kept my Christmas list short and sweet this year and I haven't stressed much.  It doesn't really feel like Christmas this year...I don't know why.  But none the less it is here.  Well, if I don't post it, Merry Christmas!

Ready for the Weekend!

I am so ready for the weekend.  Alas I have to work on Friday night.  Yuck.  The extra money will come in handy but working on the weekend sucks.  I am currently working very hard to avoid fried food, sweets and increase my fruit/veggie intake.  We are having a Bday party at work tomorrow night at work so that will be a challenge.  Trying to remember my fish oil, Benefiber, drink more water.   I have not told the world about my decision to have lap band surgery but I am slowly telling people.  I still have to wait a bit for my surgery so I'm not in a huge hurry to let the world just stare at me while I'm still fat.  That's about it for now.  Eating my salad and enjoying it.  I also passed on the chocolate cake Yea me! 

I'm falling apart!

I had my sleep study on Wednesday night and by Thursday they called me to inform me that I stopped breathing 15x's an hour.  15 time and hour?!?! HOLY CRAP!  Well, that was very upsetting to me and then on Saturday I got more news!  It seems that my triglycrides are elevated and my good cholestrol isn't good enough.  Hun...I might not make it to 40!  So let's recap, this year I have gone on blood pressure medication, I have sleep apnea, my cholesterol is elevated and what else?  Oh yeah, I'm about to have a nervous breakdown!  Now, I've been overweight for a while but I've always been healthy.  Now it seems like I'm 2 steps from death!  I am on 4 different prescription medications, fish oil (blech) calcium, a multivitamin and I'm gonna have to get one of those sexy CPAP machines.  Who's jealous?  Well, if that isn't enough co-morbitities I don't know what qualifies.  They need to put a rush on my surgery, I might not make it till May 2010 at this rate!  I have a pain in my wrist but I dare not bring it up to my doctor...it might be arthiritis.  Say a prayer for me.  I need all I can get at this point.

How do we look?

I ordered pictures of the babies today for my Christmas cards.  I hope that they turn out as good as I hope.

The journey continues

Well, I went to the hospital yesterday to get some preliminary stuff out of the way.  I had my bloodwork done, went to physical therapy so I could learn how fat people should exercise and I had a sleepstudy.  I got a phone call today to inform me that I will need to come back because I stopped breathing approximately 15 times per hour.  Hmm.  I was pretty sure that I didn't snore so I was not terribly worried about the sleepstudy.  Now I find out that I'm gonna have to drive 2 hours back to Alabama (closest in network provider for lap band) and spend another night so that I can be fitted for a lovely CPAP machine.  Fabulous.  Well, while I'm not thrilled with the fact that I will have to endure sleeping in some sort of contraption around my nose/face/head.  I am thrilled to find out why I have been so tired for the last 20 years!  I'm not totally lazy there is medical explaination!!  Whoop whoop!  I wonder if I should call my ex-husband and inform him?  I tried to tell him for years that something was wrong with me and that I wasn't crazy/lazy or just a bad wife.  Oh well, I think I'll just let that dead dog lie. 

Anywho, I am 3 months into my 7 month consults with my PCP and I have completed everything else.  At first I was ready to just get on with the banding and get rolling.  As I have been working on my paperwork and learning how my life will change with the band I have learned things that I probably wouldn't have learned if I had been able to just jump right into the band.  I had an epiphany today.  I use food as a reward, I had a hard day so I deserve a blizzard, you get the idea.  Here's the epiphany part, I also feel that food can be a punishment.  Let me explain, I can't/don't control my eating therefore I have to get water to drink and not sweet tea.  I wonder if ordering water to drink, fruit instead of fries, passing on the bread basket and saying no thanks to dessert will become second nature at some point?  I want to want the fruit but I really like fries.  Why do I have to choose? Why is it that some people can have the fries and the dessert but I can't?  Aren't I special too? Maybe these will issues will become more clear over the next few months as I learn to make better food choices.  How did food get to be such an issue with me? 

The folks have arrived

Well, the parents arrived today with my 10 year old cousin in tow.  My dogs were ecstactic to see grandma and grandpa!  Sassy actually ran to my dad.  The last time they were here Sassy was a bit timid of grandpa but warmed up to him as the visit progressed.  Maggie was so excited that she wet herself!  Can you tell that we don't get much company?  My cousin, Victoria,  loves animals and especially loves Sassy.  Sassy likes to be picked up and carried.  Maggie...not so much.  I am a wee bit discouraged right now.  I am so ready for my surgery that I can barely stand it!  I still have about 5 months left to go.  I am very greatful that my insurance covers the lapband at 90% but man I am so ready to get started.  I am going on a cruise in May and would love to have my surgery and be down some before my surgery but I doubt that will happen.  My goal is to have my surgery in June.  May would be fantastic but reality says June is more likely.  Oh well, we shall see.  I might just chunk this blog until closer time for my surgery.  Although I do enjoy reading the sucessess of everyone else.  Oh well it is time to get back to work.  Have a great Thanksgiving! 

Not so good

Well I had my second visit to my PCP on Monday.  I wish it had gone better than it did but alas I was up 2lbs.  Luckily I have a doctor with some sensitivity.  We discussed the evils of white bread, flour, potatoes and sugar.  We also discussed exercise, I still think that it's a four letter word.  But maybe when I can get a few pounds off of me it will be easier and a bit more enjoyable.  I am so tired all the time and I have no energy whatsoever.  I work nights and sleep during the day but I have been doing that for over 4 years now so one would think that I am used to it.  I wish I didn't have to go through this 7 months of visiting my doctor.  I am ready to get going with this!  I guess I will just have to tie a knot and hang on to the end.  Thanksgiving is coming up and parents are coming for a visit.  We are going to a friends house which is good, no leftovers hanging around.  Well, I guess that's about it for now...yep that's it for now. 

The journey continues

Tomorrow marks another step closer towards my goal.  I have my second of seven doctor visits with my PCP.  We will discuss weight and exercise and how I need to do more of both.  This is a conversation I can live without.  I know I need to lose weight and exercise more tell me something that I don't know.  I did find out from my parents last visit that I am getting a treadmill for my bday.  I am less than excited about this.  A treadmill to me is probably the most boring thing on the planet.  It will take a lot of work and mental focus for me to succeed on a treadmill.  It isn't the walking that is hard, it is the fact that I am walking but I'm not going anywhere.  Where is the joy in that I ask you?  At least when I'm walking down the street I can see what the neighbors are up to.  I feel the same way about walking in circles at a track.  All that work and you don't go anywhere.  I really need to get my mind wrapped around this treadmill thing and learn to embrace it.  I know I need it I just don't really want it.  I tried to tell my mom that it is difficult to walk when you weigh (slight mumble) pounds, heck it's hard to get out of bed!  Oh well, I know that this isn't forever and soon the thin person inside will be able to get out.  You know it's funny, I don't think of myself as obese.  Oh sure I know I'm overweight but I think I'm more chubby than flat out obese.  Lord help me through this journey!

Introducing Aunt Janet

Let me introduce myself.  My name isn't really important so I'm just going to go by one of my nick names, Aunt Janet.  In reality I have no brothers or sisters so therefore I have no true nephews or nieces.  I was married at one time and had two nieces by marriage but I am since divorced.  I think I miss the nieces most of all, no offense ex-hubby but there is a reason we aren't still married.  Anyway, a bit about myself but not too terribly much in case someone out there is a stalker or would seek to steal my identity (take my credit card bill please!)  I am less than or equal to 40 years of age and we shall leave it at that.  I am divorced as I mentioned earlier and have been for the past 5 years.  I live alone and I have to admit that I love it.  I grew up as an only child and I guess I have over the years learned to entertain myself and be content with my own company.  I like hanging out with my friends on occasion but I have a routine and I don't much like to stray from it.  Some people may call me boring but I like to call it stable and dependable.  Let's see what else?   Oh, I am adopted and have no idea who my biological parents are if I even want to know.  It really depends on my mood as to my answer.  Well...I guess that's a little bit about me.  I'll introduce my dogs next time.  Your gonna love them!

This is my first blog and it is still under construction so please bear with me! :)