Christmas Week Begins!

Well, it is the week of  Christmas and I am so ready for a vacation.  I am going to be spending some time with the folks and a bit of time at home getting ready for the new year.  I have kept my Christmas list short and sweet this year and I haven't stressed much.  It doesn't really feel like Christmas this year...I don't know why.  But none the less it is here.  Well, if I don't post it, Merry Christmas!

Ready for the Weekend!

I am so ready for the weekend.  Alas I have to work on Friday night.  Yuck.  The extra money will come in handy but working on the weekend sucks.  I am currently working very hard to avoid fried food, sweets and increase my fruit/veggie intake.  We are having a Bday party at work tomorrow night at work so that will be a challenge.  Trying to remember my fish oil, Benefiber, drink more water.   I have not told the world about my decision to have lap band surgery but I am slowly telling people.  I still have to wait a bit for my surgery so I'm not in a huge hurry to let the world just stare at me while I'm still fat.  That's about it for now.  Eating my salad and enjoying it.  I also passed on the chocolate cake Yea me! 

I'm falling apart!

I had my sleep study on Wednesday night and by Thursday they called me to inform me that I stopped breathing 15x's an hour.  15 time and hour?!?! HOLY CRAP!  Well, that was very upsetting to me and then on Saturday I got more news!  It seems that my triglycrides are elevated and my good cholestrol isn't good enough.  Hun...I might not make it to 40!  So let's recap, this year I have gone on blood pressure medication, I have sleep apnea, my cholesterol is elevated and what else?  Oh yeah, I'm about to have a nervous breakdown!  Now, I've been overweight for a while but I've always been healthy.  Now it seems like I'm 2 steps from death!  I am on 4 different prescription medications, fish oil (blech) calcium, a multivitamin and I'm gonna have to get one of those sexy CPAP machines.  Who's jealous?  Well, if that isn't enough co-morbitities I don't know what qualifies.  They need to put a rush on my surgery, I might not make it till May 2010 at this rate!  I have a pain in my wrist but I dare not bring it up to my doctor...it might be arthiritis.  Say a prayer for me.  I need all I can get at this point.

How do we look?

I ordered pictures of the babies today for my Christmas cards.  I hope that they turn out as good as I hope.

The journey continues

Well, I went to the hospital yesterday to get some preliminary stuff out of the way.  I had my bloodwork done, went to physical therapy so I could learn how fat people should exercise and I had a sleepstudy.  I got a phone call today to inform me that I will need to come back because I stopped breathing approximately 15 times per hour.  Hmm.  I was pretty sure that I didn't snore so I was not terribly worried about the sleepstudy.  Now I find out that I'm gonna have to drive 2 hours back to Alabama (closest in network provider for lap band) and spend another night so that I can be fitted for a lovely CPAP machine.  Fabulous.  Well, while I'm not thrilled with the fact that I will have to endure sleeping in some sort of contraption around my nose/face/head.  I am thrilled to find out why I have been so tired for the last 20 years!  I'm not totally lazy there is medical explaination!!  Whoop whoop!  I wonder if I should call my ex-husband and inform him?  I tried to tell him for years that something was wrong with me and that I wasn't crazy/lazy or just a bad wife.  Oh well, I think I'll just let that dead dog lie. 

Anywho, I am 3 months into my 7 month consults with my PCP and I have completed everything else.  At first I was ready to just get on with the banding and get rolling.  As I have been working on my paperwork and learning how my life will change with the band I have learned things that I probably wouldn't have learned if I had been able to just jump right into the band.  I had an epiphany today.  I use food as a reward, I had a hard day so I deserve a blizzard, you get the idea.  Here's the epiphany part, I also feel that food can be a punishment.  Let me explain, I can't/don't control my eating therefore I have to get water to drink and not sweet tea.  I wonder if ordering water to drink, fruit instead of fries, passing on the bread basket and saying no thanks to dessert will become second nature at some point?  I want to want the fruit but I really like fries.  Why do I have to choose? Why is it that some people can have the fries and the dessert but I can't?  Aren't I special too? Maybe these will issues will become more clear over the next few months as I learn to make better food choices.  How did food get to be such an issue with me?